The Conjuring universe has had its fair share of demons, ghouls, and malevolent spirits. Since the franchise first kicked off with the titular movie, every The Conjuring movie — including the Annabelle spin-offs, the Nun spin-offs, and the La Llorona one-off — has unleashed a new terror onto audiences worldwide.
But which Evil Bad Demon is the worst? And where do the evil but still human villains come into play? As we prepare to head to cinemas for the franchise’s latest installment, The Conjuring: Last Rites (which is allegedly the last film to feature renowned demonologist couple Ed and Lorraine Warren side by side), we revisited the most evil entities of the franchise to see if we could survive being haunted by them.
Not sure which demons are easy? Or which ones to avoid completely? We’ve got you covered.
The Black Shuck
Survivability: 5/10
If you like dogs, then the Black Shuck isn’t the scariest entity out there. However, it’s still a demonic hellhound, so be careful.
How to survive: Not to give away the ending of Annabelle Comes Home, which is where we meet this scruffy canine, but as long as you cut off the source of its evil power, the Black Shuck can’t hurt you.
The Ferryman
Survivability: 5/10
The Ferryman needs you to pay a toll, otherwise, it will take your soul as a mode of payment. Unfortunately, several people were unable to pay their dues and met their demise at the hands of this entity.
How to survive: Cut its source of power: refer to #11.
The Bride
Survivability: 5/10
The Bride is the malevolent spirit of a scorned wife who murdered her groom-to-be after finding out that he’d been cheating on her. Her ghost now haunts her wedding dress, cursing anyone who wears it to also murder their beloveds.
How to survive: Cut its source of power: Refer to #11.
The Samurai
Survivability: 5/10
One of the many haunted and possessed artifacts in the Warrens’ basement, the Samurai is a suit of armor that occasionally becomes possessed by the evil spirit of its former owner. It is prone to staring at you from across a long hallway and causing you to hallucinate about its past victims.
How to survive: Cut its source of power: Refer to #11.
The Crooked Man
Survivability: 4.5/10
The Crooked Man is just the demon Valak trying out a different form to scare you with, so don’t worry (Or maybe worry?). A nursery rhyme jingle from a toy, The Crooked Man comes to life to terrorize the Hodgson family and the Warrens in The Conjuring 2.
How to survive: Refer to #1. For added measure, make sure the toy it comes from is locked somewhere safe, like the Warrens’ basement.
Bill Wilkins
Survivability: 4.5/10
Bill Wilkins, on his own, is just a grumpy old ghost who doesn’t like it when people sit in his La-Z-Boy without permission. But when Valak uses his spirit to torment the Warrens (again), that’s when you should be extra careful around him.
How to survive: If it’s just Bill, don’t worry about it — think of him as your crochety roommate. If it’s him and Valak, though, then please refer to #1.
La Llorona
Survivability: 3.6/10
La Llorona’s going through a lot, but that doesn’t mean she won’t try to steal your children. The vengeful spirit of a mother who murdered her own sons, La Llorona brings death and misfortune to anyone who sees her crying.
How to survive: Maybe don’t have kids? Or if it’s too late for you, make sure they don’t go wandering off, because then they might see La Llorona crying, and then that will be a whole thing. If they’ve already wandered off and seen her and she’s out to get you, you can stab her with a “Fire Cross,” made out of the wood in the same forest where La Llorona drowned her own children.
Isla Kastner (a.k.a. The Occultist) and Her Demon
Survivability: 3/10
Isla could only dream of being on Bathsheba’s level, but she is still a very capable witch. A life of dabbling in the dark arts has enabled her to summon a demon to possess human hosts and find victims to act as sacrifices.
How to survive: You just need to destroy her witch altar, which she’s hidden underground in a dark, creepy labyrinth basement. Unless her demon gets you first.
Bathsheba
Survivability: 2.6/10
Bathsheba doesn’t mess around. The witch-slash-Satan-worshipper was a real piece of work back in the 1860s, sacrificing her own baby and cursing anyone who tried to live on her land. Her spirit then haunted every family that tried to make her property their own, ruining every one of them until 1971, when the Warrens came a-knocking.
How to survive: If you have her name and a priest who’s willing to exorcise her, you should be fine. She does put up a fight, though, so be ready for her to start tugging at your leg while you sleep, messing with all your clocks, and constantly trying to convince you that it’s okay to commit murder.
Annabelle/Malthus
Survivability: 1.4/10
Annabelle — both the porcelain doll of The Conjuring universe and the real-life possessed Raggedy Ann doll — serves as the conduit for the demon Malthus whom you should stay far, far away from. Malthus loves tormenting unsuspecting victims and taking their souls.
But, since he chose to latch onto a doll, he’s a little easier to subdue. The Warrens locked both the doll and Malthus in a glass case blessed with holy water, but the demon does have a way of getting you to come play.
How to survive: If Malthus is still in Annabelle, just make sure the doll’s locked in her case. If he’s out and about with the doll, though… maybe offer him a soul?
Valak the Nun
Survivability: 0.7/10
We first meet the moody, demonic woman of the cloth in The Conjuring 2, where she haunts Lorraine Warren after a seance gone wrong. The devilish diva has since become the star of her own spin-off movies, The Nun and The Nun II. She is prone to terrorizing nuns and families, as well as compelling unsuspecting victims to commit murder.
How to survive: The Blood of Christ seems to do the trick, but this is only if you get close enough to throw some at her. Otherwise, she’s really sneaky — be careful around paintings of nuns, photographs of nuns, shadows that look like nuns, etc.
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